Making Amends: How a Sober Life Can Positively Repair Family Relationships

by | Jun 1, 2020 | Recovery

sober life

Getting sober isn’t easy, but it will transform your life.

From helping you feel more mentally clear to letting your body start to heal from any damage, the benefits of a sober life are endless! You’ll become a new person, ready to take on the world again.

But, of course, living a sober life doesn’t just have an impact on you. Your family will be hugely affected by the changes you go through.

Read on to find out more about how getting sober can heal your family and help you all start again.

Understand It’s a Family Disease

Over 20 million Americans suffer from some kind of addiction. But the real number of people affected by this is much, much higher. Addiction isn’t something that only affects you; it’s a family disease, having an impact on everyone around you.

Before you start healing with your family, you need to identify and accept that they’ve suffered too. They may have struggled just as much trying to help you and deal with the situation as you have, and they’re going to have trauma too.

This means that the healing can’t just be done on your own terms or within your own timeline. It’s going to be a group effort and you all need to support, listen, and heal together. It might take time, too, but it’s well worth the effort.

Once you’ve started your journey to recover, focus on sober life and family healing with our help.

Family Support in Treatment

It’s very common for family members to come in whilst you’re still in treatment. Their support can be crucial to recovery, giving you something to work for and the love you need whilst in treatment.

This is the ideal time to begin mending wounds. You can start talking as a family with a therapist, who will guide you through some conversations to help you start expressing your feelings.

You’ll need your family more than ever whilst you recover, but make sure they’re getting the help they need too. To start with, they could read our article on how to be supportive whilst you’re in recovery, which could give them guidance. Make sure they speak to our team, too, and we can help them understand your journey.

Start Practicing Living Amends

When you’re out of in-patient treatment centers, balancing newly sober living and family can be tough. But remember that the two go hand in hand, and part of your recovery will be healing your relationships.

To start with, saying sorry isn’t usually enough. Your family has probably heard it time and time again and it could trigger emotions and memories from past relapses and behavior. Instead, try practicing living amends.

Living amends are when you use your actions to show you’re sorry and to demonstrate the changes in your life. This could be something you refused to do whilst you were drinking, such as cleaning the house or attending family dinners.

Living amends are usually small, common acts that mean a lot to your family. It shows them that you’re sorry in a way that they can believe.

Don’t Rush for Forgiveness

For sober life and spouses or other family members, forgiveness will take time. It’s likely you’ve hurt them during your addiction and this won’t be able to be healed quickly.

Don’t expect your family to start cheering at every small step you take, even if you deserve it. They’re hurt and it will take time for them to recover, just like it will for you. The more damage done, the longer it will take – but you will get there.

Remember not to measure their forgiveness by your standards. It’s a personal journey and all you can do is continue those living amends and be there for them.

Learn How to Communicate

Without communication, healing will be hard. Without good communication, it will be even harder.

One of the most important lessons a recovering addict can learn is to listen to their family. Instead of jumping up with excuses or reasoning your behavior, listen to and accept what they say. They’re not looking for explanations, just understanding.

For sober life and children, remember to communicate openly and honestly. They will have gone through trauma too and you’ll need to make sure you heal your relationships with them just as you do with everyone else.

Our team of therapists can help you communicate better with your family. If you’re worried about talking to them about the past, we’ll be here to make it easier.

Start Spending Time With Your Family

One of the most wonderful sober life benefits it’s the chance to start spending quality time with your family again. As you heal, make the most of this. It will help hugely in your recovery and in theirs, too.

Some of the benefits you can take advantage of when you’re sober include:

  • More time
  • More energy
  • More money
  • More opportunities for fun

Make sure to prioritize family time in your new life, putting them first and showing them how much they mean to you. It’ll do both you and them the world of good.

Get the Treatment You Need for a Sober Life

Family relationships can be damaged by your substance abuse, but that doesn’t mean they can’t be repaired. It may take time, but you can start again with the people you love.

If you’re looking to start living a sober life, your journey starts here. By simply having the ambition to recover, you’re making your first step. Your next step is to reach out to us at Sober Life where we can make sure you get the treatment you need.

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